Radiation Dos and Don'ts

Yesterday was my first radiation treatment.   I have to go in everyday, five days a week, for 32 treatments.  

It was pretty uneventful yesterday, aside from the fact that I woke up with a fairly nasty cold, and could not breath through my nose for most of the day.

On my way out, the technician handed me a list of "do's and don'ts" which I thought I'd share with you, along with my thoughts on each one.

1.  Do not expose the treated breast to sunlight.   I'm a 50 year old woman, living in Connecticut, and it's NOVEMBER, what the hell makes you think I'll be sunbathing topless?

2.  Wear Cotton only bras with no underwires.  Well I guess my husband won't be getting any sexy lingerie strip-teases for a while.

3.  Do not shave treated armpit.   If I'm not shaving one, then what's the point of shaving the other?

4.   Apply pure cornstarch to treated breast prior to treatment.  Just what I want to do everyday, rub gravy thickener into my boobie.

5.  Do not use any cream, lotion, cosmetics or deodorant on the treated breast.   Do women actually use cosmetics on their breasts?   Am I missing out on something here?

6.  Do not apply heat or cold to treated breast.  Again, am I missing something here?   Do women typically go around with heating pads and cold packs on their boobs?

7.  Do not scratch or rub skin on treated breast.  Well, that wouldn't be very attractive now would it?  Why don't you just tell me not to rub my crotch while you're at it?